Showing posts with label Accident. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Accident. Show all posts

Tuesday, 16 April 2013

Modern Day Issues

Nowadays we have new struggles and they can be even more dire than B.T. (before technology). The biggest, and quite possibly the scariest, yet easiest mistake to make, is the accidental email or text. 

Let me explain. 


You're super pissed off with your friend and you heed your mother's advice and decide to write her a note. Except previously our parent's would have actually written the note. You know, with a pen and paper.
If you're young enough you'll know these items as ones you see in the movies, when they do a flashback. Or perhaps you've used a pen when signing a cheque.... nah you probably don't do that either.

Anyhow, instead of writing this note of frustration, you type it. Hitting each key with such force and conviction hoping your emotion is seeping through the screen. Except just like when our parens did such things, you never actually plan to send it. You're just writing it to make yourself feel better. You finish up, and just as you begin to feel better about the situaion, it happens. You hit the send button. All it took was one slight miss with a keystroke and it was done. Letter sent. A letter you never intended that friend to see, where you talk about her ugly dog and stupid neighbourhood, maybe her disfunctional family. Saying all the things you've ever thought, but would never dare say to her, or even out loud for that matter.

This particular situation hasn't happened to me, but I have sent some emails and texts too soon, or to the wrong person. One of my worst offences was when an old boss of mine called in sick...for the kagillionith (that's a number, right?) time. Fed up with the lack of leadership and sense of responsibility, I decided to text Jeff (my co-manager) about the surprise I felt inside when I received her phone call. However, you see, Jeff's name was directly above Jen's... aka my boss. And so as I typed out my message, "Surprise! she's sick again!" and then sent it, I was feeling grand about my snide remark that was likely to give Jeff a bit of a chuckle. So imagine my surprise when I received a phone call from Jen shortly following the sending of the message. 

"Oh hey Jen- what's going on?
Is that some kid of joke, Shannon?
I'm confused- joke? huh?
Shannon, the text message you sent me."

OH SHIT! 

I quickly check my phone and YUP, I sure did send that bitchy text to Jen instead of Jeff. Trying to come up with any sort of excuse was a failed attempt, because I wasn't prepared. Not that I would pride myself on lying, but really how do you manage your way out of that one? The answer is, you don't. You try to save face as much as possible and realize that your boss may have some trust issues with you in the future, and it's probably for the best if you move onto another job in the near future. Yes, that's exactly what I did. Not just because of that situation, but I wouldnt lie to you and tell you it didn't have some bearing on the decision. 

So, while we think we can all hide behind our computer and phone screens, just make sure you can back up any comments you may want to make. And as a smart individual always warned me, never print, type or write anything you don't want to see in tomorrow's newspaper headlines. Because you never know who could see it and decide to pass it along. Oh and youngins', a newspaper is this large printed thin paper that you read the news off of. You know, prior to the computer screen. 

Saturday, 12 January 2013

Parenting Advice for Kim & Kanye

If you haven't heard the news about Kanye and Kim, then their celebrity spotlight stint didn't work very well for them. Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are pregnant. Well, technically it's Kim who's preggers, but he's (supposedly) the father.

            The results are in...and Kanye, you.... ARE the father!



We feel the same way Kanye.

In an effort to try and help a brotha' out (I'm honing in on my black side here), I thought I'd write down some tips to both Kanye and Kim about what they should and shouldn't teach their baby. Based on previous escapades, of course.

We know you're crazy Kim
  • You may up your street cred, but not your fan following, when you upstage someone and steal a microphone when they're accepting an award. Apologies that follow may be seen as forced celebrity manager "parenting".
  • Creating a show with all your family could make you famous...for simply doing nothing. However, as you gain popularity you also lose respect. 
  • Thinking you're great, and actually being great are very different. Make sure you choose the right option.
  • Sex tapes are never a good idea! But they do make your name a common one in the household.
  • People will laugh at you if you dare to compare Coldplay to The Beatles, stating Coldplay is just as good, or better, than The Beatles.  
  • Defaulting to a fashion "career" is only a good idea if you've gained all those sheep fans
  • Twitter can emphasize just how stupid you are- so be careful.
  • Don't get married (for the 2nd time) for it only to last 72 days. Because then you meet your baby-daddy and things get messy. It has publicity stunt failure written all over it!
  • K's are a popular letter in our families- get used to it
  • If you become famous, don't lie about things like your sister's paternity or tweets you've sent... Or just anything in general. 
  • Don't be friends with other airhead heiresses
  • You can sing about it, but just know...not everyone is a gold digger.
  • Lots of perfume lines won't make you seem more upscale...you'll just smell really strongly
  • Sometimes it's best to keep your mouth shut... In all aspects.
"Do you think they know how ridiculous we really are?"

Friday, 12 October 2012

And so it's official...

... ding-dong the Mac is dead.

This past Monday was a day I had been waiting for, for the past 2 weeks.  After what I'm now referring to as "the water incident" (you can read about that here), my new, shiny and lovely MacBook Pro is... *sigh* dead.  It turns on but the reaction time is beyond slow. Slower than my old MacBook from 8 years ago... Sllllllllllooooooow as a snail on roofies.


It makes me so sad, because I waited so long to get that computer, dealing with the slow death of my old one.  And now it will be gone.  Totally a first world problem- but having to use Brandon's PC laptop is super lame. He tells me I'm Apple brainwashed, but that's not true, I just know products I like and I'm loyal to them.  Apple- are you sure you don't want to send me a brand new MacBook Pro?!

So my plights to the Mac God will continue... until I have enough money to purchase a new one.

In other news, we got our new car.
Truck.
SUV.
Whatever you want to classify it is- it's a Hyundai Santa Fe.



Let's be real here and acknowledge the fact that it's a 2008 used Santa Fe, but we feel so luxurious in it.  It's just a general "working-man's" vehicle, but it's kind of high end in that category. Plus anything would be considered luxurious compared to my plastic Saturn.  Plastic and styrofoam that is. Oh yes, folks, my front bumper was made purely of styrofoam- which is why I assume, my little Saturn that could turned into squished plastic.



Brandon and I kind of feel like rich adults driving it. You know how when you're in your twenties and you don't quite yet feel like a "real" adult? This seems to be a younger generation thing, because our parents were all married and had us kids by our age, so I suppose they already felt like "real adults". But this car kind of cements that getting older, more mature and more responsible feeling.

We drive around feeling rich. Sitting in our heated leather seats (didn't you know the rich have warm bums?), sunroof open, a real stereo with FIVE speakers playing Mumford & Sons from all angles of the vehicle, with a CD player and real heat and air conditioning...that works! It's the life of royalty I assure you.

Monday, 1 October 2012

One, Two, Buckle My Shoe...

Things happen in three's, right?  So I'm waiting for my third.  I'm hoping it was when I stubbed my toe yesterday, but I'm thinking that wasn't big enough.

First there was my water logged MacBook. My poor, poor MacBook still laying in a bag of rice with any hope it will dry out. I didn't give much thought to the coming in three's rule. That is until Saturday around 1pm, when I totaled my car.

Granted the car wasn't a masterpiece of auto-amazingness. But it was my car that got me from point A to point B- generally work to home. You know, helping me make money to save for a house and whatnot.


This isn't my car, but it is the closest representation via an online search I could find. I wish I had thought to take a picture of my cheap little Saturn that didn't in any way do well in what should have been classified as a fender bender.  The other vehicle just had some rusted out pieces fall off her rear bumper, but my car... it's whole front end is destroyed.  Can you imagine if I had ever been in a serious accident? Like head on collision? My car's airbags didn't even go off.

So, Brandon and I will be off to look for a new vehicle this week. And until we get it, I'm busing it around town (horray). And waiting for my third (and hopefully final) awful happening. Let me know if you see it coming, and I'll try to avoid it. Or maybe it's like the Final Destination rules- it will find you. Perhaps it's best to just let it happen.